Second Half, Best Half: Empowering Mindset Shifts for Women

Embracing your Second Act: Empowering Mindset Shifts for Women Midlife

I don’t know about you but as I am well into being a midlifer and most of the time I fail to feel or remember this fact. I still feel like I did when I was in my twenties but much better as far as confidence and nofucksgiviness. Yes, this is my new word.

I truly believe this is because I’m always working on and upgrading my mindset to keep me inspired and feeling good. I also believe that being single has helped with this quite a bit. 

Hear me out. It’s just me in my household and sometimes that does suck, like when you're sick and you have to walk the dog. Most of the time what it does is give me the freedom to do whatever I want when I want without any judgment or insecurities. I know  a lot of people do have this type of a relationship with their significant other but I never did. 

I like the fact that if I want to change anything about myself and my surroundings I don’t have to check in with anyone. I just do it and see what happens. This has always made it easy for me to make changes to the way I live my life , where I live, and what I do for a living and fun.

Entering and being in midlife is a time of amazing change, it's also a golden opportunity to rediscover yourself and embrace life with joy and confidence. By making some of these simple mindset shifts, you can navigate this transition feeling empowered, relevant, successful, happy, content, and at peace.

 Let’s dive into some fun mindset shifts that will make your midlife journey an amazing adventure!

1. From Fear to Curiosity

Anytime I feel the fear, as in the type that I catch myself saying, you can’t do that tine, how are you going to do that, your too old. That’s when I know. I have to do what ever that is. Almost 100% of the time on the other side of this fear is magic that helps me grow and expand, meet new people, and do things I never thought in a million years I thought I would do. 

One of those things was the podcast. I’ve met so many amazing people all over the world. I can’t imagine what I would be doing if I decided, naaa, that's too hard to start a podcast, or another judgment I had was. I’m not a good speaker. 

Well, pardon my French but who fucking cares. No one does, just me. It’s only me holding me back. 

So I'm here to tell you to do the thing! Just start today!

Why It's Needed: Fear of the unknown can feel like a big, scary monster. But guess what? Curiosity is the superhero that can conquer it!

Benefits: Embracing curiosity opens up a world of new possibilities and keeps life exciting. Always ask yourself, what if I did that and succeeded? Then what?

Baby Step: Try something new every day. Whether it's a quirky hobby or a new flavor of ice cream, go for it!

Affirmation: "There is magic on the other side of fear and doubt."

2. From Self-Criticism to Self-Compassion

This is one of the best things about being in midlife as far as I’m concerned. You runout of fucks to give. They just run out. 

When I let my hair go gray was when I noticed how much everyone had to say about my appearance and also, felt the need to tell me. Complete strangers. It was so interesting. Some of the things I was told were:

*No man will ever want to date me. Proven false.

*You’ll look worn out and haggard. To whom? 

*You’ll look 10 years older. Who cares, it’s not like I want to date younger men. 

I’ll tell you what did happen. I was casually dating this man and once I told him I was letting my hair go gray he was appalled. Why would you do that? Don’t you want to look younger? I was like, no why do I need to look younger. The answer to that I think was to be relevant to be at his side. Just a looks thing. 

The benefit of letting my hair go gray was healthier hair and it weeded out the complete asshole men. They just left me alone. Brilliant! 

When I started to accept myself exactly as I was all of the imperfections that make me, me. This is when I really felt comfortable. I looked at how amazing my body was to create 3 amazing humans, to run marathons, to recover and heal. We are all perfect. 

Acknowledge how amazing you are. Accept how amazing you are. All while always striving to grow, expand, and be the best version of you.

Why It's Needed: We all have that inner critic who loves to nitpick. Time to replace it with a kind inner cheerleader!

Benefits: Self-compassion reduces stress and boosts your emotional resilience.

Baby Step: Every evening, jot down one thing you appreciate about yourself. You’re awesome—celebrate it!

Affirmation: "I treat myself with kindness and compassion."

Quote: "Talk to yourself like you would to someone you love." – Brené Brown

3. From Regret to Gratitude

We can build up a lot of regret by the time we reach midlife. Holy shit, some of the things I did. You know what I realize though. The more mistakes and failures you experience the more successes you’ll experience. Also, your life is way more fun and interesting. 

So, what are you waiting for? Get out there and try new things and fuck up alot. 

Another thing I absolutely know for sure is that no one, I mean NO ONE, knows what their doing. We are all just winging it and the ones who take the most action, have the most wins. 

I’m sure if you really know all the absolute failures a successful person had you would be willing to put yourself out there more. 

We ever get to see that part though, we see the win, the success. I’m telling you though, there is a whole bunch of fuck ups behind all successful people.

Start embracing and having gratitude for all the failures, the lovely lessons that help mold and shift your life, they help you learn. Embrace them for the free education they are!

Why It's Needed: Regret is like carrying around a heavy backpack. Gratitude is the key to lightening your load.

Benefits: Gratitude makes you happier and healthier. Who doesn't want that?

Baby Step: Start a gratitude journal. Write down three things you’re grateful for each day.

Affirmation: "I am grateful for the abundance in my life."

Quote: "Gratitude turns what we have into enough." – Aesop

4. From Scarcity to Abundance

Why It's Needed: A scarcity mindset can make you feel like there’s never enough. Abundance is about seeing the endless possibilities around you.

Benefits: Embracing abundance makes you feel fulfilled and open to new opportunities.

Baby Step: Use affirmations that focus on abundance, like "I attract abundance and prosperity into my life."

Affirmation: "I live in a world of abundance and possibilities."

5. From Comparison to Authenticity

This was another big one for me and a lot of people. I always say that comparison is the killer of all dreams. Because it is. How many times do you find yourself wanting to try something new and you see someone already doing it. Worse yet, they are younger than you and have it mastered. You think I’ll never be that good, I’m too old, or whatever other nonsense comes into your head. Then, you don’t even try. Dream killed. 

What you don’t realize is that you are unique, no one can do anything like you and if you dream it, it's your responsibility to share that with the world. Your version. The one no one else can create!

We all are unique beings and we all come from different circumstances with different blessings and challenges. The truth is, there is NO COMPARISON. None. 

There are no two exact things that you can compare when it comes to human beings. So embrace the magic of being you. Your job in this lifetime is to do just that and then to share yourself with the world.

Why It's Needed: Comparing yourself to others is a one-way ticket to feeling inadequate. Being your authentic self is so much better!

Benefits: Authenticity builds self-esteem and creates genuine connections.

Baby Step: Reflect on your unique strengths and talents, and celebrate them, write them out. Know that, you’re one of a kind!

Affirmation: "I am proud of my unique journey and strengths."

Quote: "Be yourself; everyone else is already taken." – Oscar Wilde

6. From Perfectionism to Acceptance

I had to let go of perfection when I became a single mom of 3. I quickly realized that this is an impossible task by oneself and that any form of perfection does not exist. Things are either half-assed or just done. This lesson made me able to let go of having things be perfect before I started things and now I just say, let’s do it and see what happens. I’ll perfect it later as time passes. Perfection keeps you stagnant. Perfection does not exist because everyone has a different definition of what perfect is. 

Why It's Needed: Chasing perfection is exhausting. Embrace the beautiful, messy you!

Benefits: Acceptance reduces stress and increases happiness.

Baby Step: Let go of one small expectation of perfection each week. Imperfection is beautiful!

Affirmation: "I accept myself completely, flaws and all."

Quote: "Perfection is not attainable, but if we chase perfection we can catch excellence." – Vince Lombardi

7. From Isolation to Connection

This is something I’m experiencing right now as I write this. I live in a very rural area. While it’s beautiful in the summer and fall, the winter. Well, the winter will push you into nothing but depression. I do struggle to make connections here because most are 20 years my senior or have VERY different values then myself. 

I have to be very intentional about making connections online, and also getting the hell out of here as much as possible to connect with others outside of this area. 

A work in progress for me but I can feel the importance of making this change sooner rather then later. 

Now, I  make the best of the relationships I have near and far and I am very intentional about nurturing the relationships I do have.

Why It's Needed: Where are in transition, it is exactly that, a transition. We change and so do others. This can sometimes feel lonely, but connecting with others can fill your life with joy and support.

Benefits: Connection enhances your emotional well-being and builds a strong support network.

Baby Step: Reach out to a friend or join a community group. Connection is key!

Affirmation: "I am connected to a community of love and support."

8. From Stagnation to Growth

Feeling stuck in life can be very frustrating but there is almost always a lesson in it. Why do I feel this way? What do I want? Answering these questions can take some time and they can help you move through this transition. 

What I’ve noticed working as a life purpose coach is that when we feel stuck we are holding onto something we need to release and usually have fear of the unknown ahead of us. 

Being in midlife is full of so many emotional and BIG changes for a lot of us and it can be overwhelming. This is when we go from being full time parents to sometimes parent. We free up a lot of time and sometimes things come up. 

Those questions we ask ourselves. What am I doing with my life? Who the hell am I married to? I do nothing fun anymore, what happened to fun me? When did I get so serious? Who the hell am I and where did the real me go? 

Even when you’re not a parent there are things like separation, divorce, career changes, looming retirement, it's a bit overwhelming. 

This is why we feel stuck. I do so many podcasts on how to get unstuck, if you feel stuck, go binge the podcast HERE<<

Why It's Needed: Feeling stuck is no fun. Embrace growth and keep moving forward!

Benefits: Growth promotes personal and professional development and keeps you motivated.

Baby Step: Set a small, achievable goal each month. Keep growing, superstar & binge the podcast!

Affirmation: "I am committed to my personal growth and development."

Quote: "The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance." – Alan Watts

So there you have it, my fabulous friend! By embracing these playful mindset shifts, you can turn midlife into a thrilling adventure. Remember, change doesn’t happen overnight, but with a bit of practice, you can transform your outlook and experience. Embrace this journey with an open heart, and watch as your life becomes more fulfilling and vibrant.

Remember, you're the same fun, adventurous person you always were, go and explore ways to entice that side of you to come out and play again. Live life now. 

Keep your heart open to love, excitement, and challenge and be at peace with yourself."

Here’s to a fantastic journey filled with love, laughter, and endless possibilities! 

Xo, T

P.S. For more guidance, support, and accountability in getting unstuck and embracing change and your life, set up a intro call to see if working with me is a good fit. HERE<<